It's Friday. Sex?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
