I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Randomize
