just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
