i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
you had me at cake vodka
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
