You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
