I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize