Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize