I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
