Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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