Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize