I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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