I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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