I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
