im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
