he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
