do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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