Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
