dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
