It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
