I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
