Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
