In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
