i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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