So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
