Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
