She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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