there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
hell yes lets make some ravioli
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
