i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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