would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
