it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
