I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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