sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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