My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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