I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
