who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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