I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
