I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
