Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
