She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
