Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
