My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
