I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
