Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Randomize
