did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
