He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
