what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i barfeds in our rink
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Randomize
