Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
