she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Randomize
