look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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