We won't sleep together?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize